Here is how Brian Croft pastors his congregation by praying for and contacting each of them intentionally at least one time a month

I created a prayer guide with each member of the church broken into a 28 day chart in alphabetical order.  This is to represent the first 28 days of each month.  On day 1, I pray for those 5-6 people or families.  Then, I try to make some kind of personal contact with them that day in the form of a home visit, email, hand written card, phone call, facebook note, or text message to let them know I prayed for them on that day.  Lastly, I ask in that moment of personal contact if there is anything I can do to serve them.  For those I haven’t seen recently, I will usually call or go see them to get an update on how they are doing in general.

I repeat the same process for day 2, then day 3…all the way to day 28.  If I am faithful and consistent in this process (which I never do perfectly) I would have prayed and made contact with all those who have been entrusted in my care in one month.  Any extra days of the month I do the same thing with our missionaries and others we have sent into ministry from our church.

This became such a fruitful system to keep up with all our folks that I took it to our other pastors/elders and they began to do it also.  It became such a fruitful system for each of us as pastors that we made a chart for our members and encouraged them to pray for each other in the same way as a prayer guide for our church.  Several of the members have even adopted the model of the pastors to contact folks that day they pray for them.   It has been amazing the fruit that has come from many of our members taken this task to pray for one another seriously.

On our women’s retreat last month, one of our dear ladies in the church led our ladies in a project to take that chart and transfer it to index cards that can sit on their table a home in the form of a flip calendar.  Each morning, you just flip to the next day and you see who you are to be praying for that day.  Since putting this on the table in our home, our children now make an assertive effort to pray for those appointed for that day.

While the subheading for the recent Christianity Today interview with Francis Chan is horrible (Francis Chan says we should stop trying to make people love Jesus, and learn to rely on prayer, elders, and the Holy Spirit instead. Really, he advocated that) the interview is amazing. Chan is consistently one of the most Holy Spirit-aware, Bible-integrating speakers that I listen to. He’s consistently comparing his life and the life of his church against what he reads in God’s Word and there’s little, if any, of his interpretation that I can argue with. Here are some questions and answers from the interview

Q: So the example of the elders and leadership is more important, even in a large church, than having the right programs or preaching?

Absolutely. That is 100 percent true. There are a lot of churches with leaders that aren’t living out their faith together, and they don’t have trust. Instead they’re trying to bring transformation by creating programs. That’s why you often hear of people who say, “I love church but once I got into the leadership, the inner workings, I was so disillusioned.” That’s a terrible indictment.

Q: How can we know if our ministry is being empowered by the Spirit?

Churches that are built through our effort rather than the Spirit’s will quickly collapse when we stop pushing and prodding people along.

Now we should push, prod, and persuade men, but I’ve learned to spend a lot more time praying and asking the Spirit to move and begging God to send forth laborers.

The more you look at Scripture, the more you realize that nothing happens unless God is behind it. Jesus is building his church. I just want to be a part of that. I’ll keep doing my work, but the fruit is up to him. We can only pray, “Please, please, please let us see your Spirit at work. May it be like a mighty wind that moves us.”

Q: Cornerstone is a megachurch by definition. Is the size of the church evidence that a “wave” of the Spirit is happening?

A large gathering where everyone is singing really loud is nice, but it’s not an indication that the Spirit is at work. We don’t see that biblically. If that’s success, then we’d be spending more money on better musicians and better worship leaders. But that’s not how our elder board measures success.

In God’s eyes success is people loving each other deeply, caring for one another, digging deep in each other’s lives, sharing their possessions, and sharing the gospel in their communities. Are they fully devoted followers of Jesus? Is there transformation happening? Do they see themselves as part of something bigger than themselves—a body with a mission larger than the individual?

Our job is not to keep as many people as possible. Our job is to make sure that we’re setting a biblical pattern.

Q: But you have had people get upset and leave.

Yeah, and it’s hard. But Jesus really didn’t have a problem with turning people off if they weren’t ready for the commitment. What I see in Scripture is that’s it’s all or nothing. We are called to die to ourselves; it’s complete death, surrender.

I tell people, “It’s great that you’re checking us out and learning, and I pray that you’ll come to understand that God is good and nothing compares to him. I hope at that point you’ll give your life to Jesus and follow him.”

The commitment to follow Jesus is like marriage. It’s a lifelong commitment for better or for worse. And if someone is not ready to make that commitment, then they shouldn’t get married.

Q: How do you respond when someone walks away because they’re not ready for the commitment?

We always have to check our own hearts and make sure we communicated with them in love. Early on when people first started to leave, there wasn’t a lot of love or compassion. We sort of considered it a victory that people walked away. There was some arrogance in us, and that breaks my heart. Even now it’s always hard when a person leaves. And so we rally around each other, encourage one another, and remind each other that this is going to happen but we’ve got to keep teaching it.

Q: Do you ever get accused of being pharisaical for calling people to such a high commitment?

Oh, absolutely. The comment I get is that we’re becoming a cult because we call people to make a commitment. We define cults as communities overly committed to a belief system. By that definition Jesus would have been leading a cult. So today Mormons are willing to ride their bikes around town, Jehovah’s Witnesses will knock on doors, but as Christians we don’t have to do anything. We’ve been taught a watered-down version of following Jesus for so long that people think it’s Christianity, but it’s not biblical.

I have to be honest and say there were so many times I wanted to quit, because it is really painful when friends leave and your loudest fans become your loudest critics. It does get lonely. And it’s hard when leaders who are with you start getting attacked. I get very defensive of my leaders because I love these guys. I don’t want people to think it’s easy to lead the church into greater depth and commitment. It stinks at times. But when you look back to the Word, you realize this is the way it’s got to be, and you have peace.

“We’ve been taught a watered-down version of following Jesus for so long that people think it’s Christianity, but it’s not biblical.” That line is hitting me hard right now. Am I really willing to follow Christ, knowing that it will require complete surrender to Him? Am I really willing to commit, come what may? I feel like some recent events (the twins, financial questions, etc) have put me in a position of needing to wholly depend on Christ and be completely committed. I’m not scared of what is to come. In face I’m really excited that God has called me to Himself through Chris tand that my whole life is an opportunity to give Him His due praise and glory.

As a pastor or elder

Pastors and elders, the next time you are criticized for being unloving or unconcerned, ask yourselves:

1. Do we have some mechanism for personally knowing our sheep? As leaders, we will give an account for how well we watched over our people’s souls (Heb. 13:7). The Bible doesn’t mandate only one way for doing member care, but we must work to have some process in place. If we never ask, “How is the congregation doing?” or better yet, “How are you doing?” we should not be surprised to find lots of people falling through the cracks.
2. Do we have some way of knowing when people are not showing up at church? You can eyeball it, check the friendship pads, or spy out the church mailboxes, but we need to have a general sense of who is not making faithful use of the means of grace. Our Book of Church Order stipulates we talk about it at every elders’ meeting. The first step to noticing who’s missing is to start looking and start talking about it.
3. Are we confronting cliquishness in our church? The line between community and clique is often blurry. But if there’s one central difference it’s openness. A healthy community welcomes new people in. A clique finds ways to keep new people out. Pastors need to confront the problem of “closed circles” head on–in preaching, in structural decisions, and in one on one conversations. The leaders also need to make sure they are not in a closed circle themselves. Good friends are good. Good friends to the exclusion of everyone else is very bad.
4. Are there easy, identifiable ways for the shy, the non go-getters, and the more culturally reserved to get involved and be known by others? The confident entrepreneurs will make their way in the church just fine. But well-advertised entry points and personal invitations are required for many others.
5. Is it at least possible that we are more at fault than we think? Leadership doesn’t mean saying you’re sorry every time Mr. Sensitive feels offended. But it does mean always being open to the possibility that you’ve screwed up more than you thought.
6. Have we made promises we didn’t deliver on? There’s nothing more deadly than well-publicized, poorly executed good intentions. The elders launch a family visitation program, but only make it to half the homes. A pastor agrees to follow up his lobby conversation with a phone call and then forgets all about it. The church promises every member will get a mentor, but it ends up there aren’t enough mentors to go around. Don’t set the bar so high you’re bound to crash into it.
7. Are these critics generally critical? Pastors can waste their time with divisive grumblers. When they do so they are often too worn out to listen when a loyal member offers a thoughtful critique. We shouldn’t spend a lot of time on the squeaky wheels unless it’s an unfamiliar squeak. In other words, consider the source and remember “faithful are the wounds of a friend.”

As a member

As for the hurting and disappointed, before you criticize your leaders ask yourselves these questions:

1. Did I ever ask for help? Pastors and elders are not omniscient. Even with the best shepherding strategies people will fall through the cracks. So if you really need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. I know everyone wants to be noticed. But it’s hard for a dozen guys to notice five hundred or two dozen to notice two thousand. Help your leaders help you.
2. Have I overlooked opportunities to fit in and get to know people? Before you complain that you’ve been at the church six months and still don’t know anyone, think about ways you could get known in the next six months. Is there a small group you could join? Could you attend the smaller, more informal evening service? What about volunteering for the nursery next time the sign up sheet goes around? Have you tried the potlucks and picnics and prayer meetings? Giving love and being loved is 90% just showing up.
3. Is it realistic for the leaders to give to every person in this church the kind of care I expect? It’s easy to think “All I wanted was one visit. You can’t tell me they were too busy to set aside one night for my family.” But remember you aren’t the only person at the church. If the general level of care you expect from your leaders cannot be multiplied by the number of people in the church, then you may be hoping for too much. If you expect everything, you’ll always be disappointed.
4. If I really wanted to be loved and noticed why did I stop showing up? On the one hand, church leaders should know when their members have drifted away. Good shepherds keep an eye on their sheep. But on the other hand, if sheep want to be cared for by the flock, they shouldn’t stay from it. People get hurt when their church absence isn’t noticed. But I have a hard time feeling too much sympathy, unless you’re dealing with a shut-in or someone whose absence is not voluntary. Don’t run away if you want to be found.
5. Am I willing to consider that I may be at fault more than I realize? If it feels like your leaders can never do anything right, maybe you’re the one making life miserable–for them and for you.
6. Is it possible I’ve overlooked ways the body has cared for me because I was hoping a different part of the body would care for me? Sometimes church members will say, “Sure, my small group sent me cards but the pastor never called.”  Or, “Yes the pastors were very friendly to greet me after church, but no one my age ever said hello.” Or, “I know the elders care for me, but that’s their job.” Or conversely, “True, my friends prayed for me, but I never heard from my elder.” Before you get angry, remember the goal is for the body to care for the body, not for the shoulder to always get a special backrub from its favorite hand.
7. In general have I found this church and these leaders to be unloving and unsupportive? If the answer is yes, and Question 5 is dealt with too, then you may need a different church. But if the answer is no, consider giving your church and your leaders the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they just botched this one. We all get it wrong sometimes. I know I have. Maybe they were too busy and dropped the ball. Or maybe you don’t know the whole story. In any event, don’t let one misstep color your whole impression of their ministry.

For both sheep and shepherds the indispensable requirements for living together are love and humility. Love to treat others as we want to be treated. Humility to consider how we may be at fault. Disappointment in the church is bound to happen. But it doesn’t have to destroy the unity of the body. The Lord can use our hurts to make all of us slower to speak and quicker to listen.

Great words, as usual, from Kevin DeYoung, Senior Pastor at University Reformed Church in East Lansing, Michigan

I daresay that no current Christian leader and writer has had as much impact on me as Mark Dever, Senior Pastor of Capital Hill Baptist Church. He loves the church and loves to serve her while calling churches to greater fidelity to God. His books have been illuminating, challenging, and foundational to my understanding of ecclesiology and church life. I can’t highly recommend them enough.

A number of years ago he and Capital Hill Baptist started 9Marks, which is “a ministry dedicated to equipping church leaders with a biblical vision and practical resources. Our goal is simple: churches that display the glory of God“. The nine marks that are needed in a healthy, biblical church are

1. Expositional Preaching.
2. Biblical Theology.
3. A Biblical Understanding of the Good News.
4. A Biblical Understanding of Conversion.
5. A Biblical Understanding of Evangelism.
6. Biblical Church Membership.
7. Biblical Church Discipline.
8. Biblical Discipleship and Growth.
9. Biblical Church Leadership

Recently 9Marks posted overview videos about each mark. You can watch them below, along with a video announcing a new collab between 9Marks and Lamp Mode Recordings, a lyrical theology record label. Who would have guessed a church where the preacher wears a suit each week would be the inspiration between a rap album?

Mark 1 – Expositional Preaching

Mark 2 – Biblical Theology

Mark 3 – A Biblical Understanding of the Good News

Mark 4 – A Biblical Understanding of Conversion

Mark 5 – A Biblical Understanding of Evangelism

Mark 6 – Biblical Church Membership

Mark 7 – Biblical Church Discipline

Mark 8 – Biblical Discipleship and Growth

Mark 9 – Biblical Church Leadership

And here’s the rap video announcement

Elders lead the church. The main Biblical passages about their qualifications are 1 Timothy 3:1-7 and Titus 1:5-10. Specifically, 1 Timothy 3:6 reads

He must not be a recent convert, or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil

Since an elder must not be a recent convert, it stands to reason that elders must be tested and examined. This something many churches do not do when they appoint as elders good speakers or good business vs. holy Christians. Some churches have an examination process for elder candidates. Some of my bros in my Re:Train cohort are going through elder training at Mars Hill Church and I think it’s a year-long process. Coram Deo in Omaha, Nebraska has a  “6-month course of study and discussion” towards becoming an elder that “culminates with the examination phase.” Here’s the description of that phase written by Lead Pastor/Elder Bob Thune.

• Written essays outlining spiritual history, practice of spiritual disciplines, theological influences, leadership strengths and weaknesses, and understanding/articulation of the gospel
• A 3-hour written exam testing Bible comprehension and pastoral wisdom. For example: “What is the significance of Colossians 1 and 2 to our understanding of Christology?” And: “How would you comfort and encourage a couple at Coram Deo who just miscarried 9 weeks into pregnancy? What biblical passages would you take them to?” And: “A non-Christian in your MC asserts that he is a pretty moral person and, to his knowledge, has never broken one of the Ten Commandments. What Scripture passages would you take him to in order to show him that sin does not consist merely in outward acts?”
• A full review of stewardship, budget, debt and family finances by the CD Financial Team
• An oral assessment that tests “on-the-spot” Bible knowledge, theological acuity, and pastoral discernment
• A husband/wife interview assessing family health, marriage and parenting practices, conflict resolution, etc.
• A major theological position paper interacting with some current topic in church life (Coram Deo’s current position papers on Poverty and on Divorce and Remarriage are the fruit of past elder examinations)

It’s our desire to raise up men who 1) meet the biblical qualifications for eldership in 1 Timothy 3 and Titus 1 and 2) have the full faith and trust of the entire Coram Deo community. This examination phase is a key step toward that end. Please pray for the men who are in the midst of it right now. And pray that God will raise up many more!

I’m very grateful that Bob posted this. It’s an excellent model to follow as I look to plant and raise up elders. It’s also very close to the same material that my Acts 29 application included, which makes sense, since every elder should be qualified to plant a church.

I realize this is old news, but it’s a great note from Grace Driscoll, wife of Mark Driscoll (Mars Hill Church) and daughter of a pastor, on why it’s a good thing that John Piper is taking a sabbatical.

I am thankful for the precedent and example that Dr. Piper and Noël are setting because:

1. It frees up wives and children to be priorities (1 Tim. 3:4; Eph. 5:28).
2. It allows the church and ministry to not be idols (1 Tim. 3:5).
3. It can give wives a new freedom to have this honest discussion with their husbands (I have seen many wives silenced or unsure of how to have this conversation when they have genuine concern) (Prov. 19:14).
4. It can give children a new freedom to have this honest discussion with their dads (I have seen so many kids of pastors feeling last on the list with the church at the top) (Prov. 17:6).
5. It urges us all to examine our priorities and make sure our Jesus, our marriage, and our children are the top three, in that order (1 Tim. 3:1–5).
6. It challenges the church to give their pastor the freedom to examine his own life and take a break if needed (Mark 2:27–28).
7. It challenges us to not idolize pastors or think of them as sinless, but rather see them as gifted, called men (under immense pressure) who need to be free to repent and be redeemed like the rest of the church members (Heb. 13:18).
8. It challenges wives to examine if they have enabled their pastors-husbands to become islands unto themselves (Gen. 2:18; Prov. 31:12).

Practical Shepherding is a blog you should read. It’s full of , well, practical posts for pastors and church leaders. Here are a few recent posts on service reviews, which I got to see first hand at a 9Marks Weekender at Capital Hill Baptist in DC.

What is a service review?

Service review takes place as a round table discussion with one primary facilitator to evaluate the public gatherings for that Lord’s Day.  For our church, it works best to have this time 15 minutes after our evening service with duration of forty five minutes – one hour.  There are two main benefits:  First, everyone is already at church to meet before going home for the day.  Second, the gatherings for that Lord’s Day are fresh on everyone’s minds and hearts, which produce a more engaged evaluation.  This time also provides wives and children the option to stay and fellowship with one another while the men meet.  Sensitivity to families waiting is why this meeting should last one hour maximum.  Anyone is invited to attend, but is primarily attended by those men who participate in leading and preaching in the public gathering, or aspire to do so.  Those leading and preaching that day, as well as current pastoral interns are required to attend.

What is the purpose of a service review?

The primary role of service review is two fold:  First, service review is a safeguard to maintain biblical fidelity within the public gatherings of the church.  Secondly, service review is a tool to cultivate the skill of giving and receiving sincere, helpful, and godly criticism, which does not come naturally.  It must be learned, taught, and molded into believers.  Within these two chief purposes, there are several other purposes to be accomplished in setting this time aside to evaluate:

• To provide an opportunity to speak words of encouragement as well as correction if needed into the lives of those who led and preached in the public gathering.
• To create a culture of evaluating the public gatherings, not by preference or style, but biblically, theologically, pastorally, and practically.
• To create an environment to evaluate critically what is important and what is not important in regard to sermons and services.
• To create an environment for those participating and observing to learn, grow, and mature in the various roles discussed.
• To learn discernment in what are helpful, instructive comments—and what are not.
• To create an environment of humility, trust, fellowship, and openness with our lives to those present.

What is the process of a service review?

The facilitator’s role is much like a moderator or chairman.  He is to keep the discussion progressing in a helpful direction and protect the group from digressing in a negative manner.  The facilitator asks a question about the service or sermon and goes around the table soliciting thoughts and comments about that particular question.  Here are a few examples:

• Did the service run on one continuous theme that led into the preaching?
• What encouraging comments do you have for those who led the service?
• What could have been done better?
• Any theological concerns with the songs chosen?
• Did the congregation seem to sing well? Why or why not?
• What was one truth prayed in the service that was particularly meaningful to you?
• Was the Lord’s Table administered in a biblically appropriate way?
• Were there any distractions that need to be mentioned?
• What connections did you see to the scripture readings and the sermon?
• What is something new you learned in the exposition of the text?
• What application from the sermon was particularly meaningful to you?
• Was there any portion of the sermon that you would suggest amending?
• Were there any errors spoken, or clarifications that need to be made by those who led or preached?

The facilitator can also use this time to have a short discussion about a topic if he feels it would benefit the group.  Topics could include approaches to preaching a certain text, factors in determining songs, methods of applying texts edifyingly and faithfully, good templates to think through when praying publicly, and techniques for communicating effectively (e.g., voice inflection) are useful conversations to have with those leading, preaching, and aspiring to do so in your congregation.

This approach should leave those involved challenged to think through different issues in regard to the public gatherings of your church, but ultimately this time should encourage those who labored in leading and preaching, unless a particularly poor job was done.  If you find these meetings have a more critical feel than mutual edification, you need to consider whether this time has taken too critical a direction and adjustments need to be made.

Here are some recent posts about elders. Daniel Montgomery of Sojourn Community Church writes of their elder installation process in 2 parts (part 1 and part 2). Kevin DeYoung of University Reformed Church describes how congregational care works at his church and the role that elders play. Here are some highlights of each post

Elder Installation (asked of each elder)

1. Do you believe the historic Scriptures to be the inerrant, inspired Word of God, the only infallible authority on Christian faith and practice?
2. Do you whole-heartedly affirm the historic Christian faith – the gospel, the church and God’s mission – as taught by the elders of this church and as lived out in the practices of this community; and if at any time you come to disagree with any of the fundamentals of the gospel, the church or God’s mission as your fellow elders hold firm, through the Scriptures, will you take initiative to make known your change in views to your fellow elders?
3. Do you affirm Sojourn’s constitution, her government and church discipline practices thoughtfully drawn from the general principles found in the Bible?
4. Do you promise a heart of peace and unity toward your brother elders and your church family?
5. Do you affirm that you have been driven, as best you know of your own heart, to desire the work of an elder in this church by your love of God and a sincere desire to see Jesus’ gospel transform everything?
6. Do you promise to be faithful and diligent in the exercise of all your duties as Christian men and elders in this church, as an individual and in community, privately and publicly; and to strive, by the grace of God, to put on Christ while putting off sin in your life and to walk above reproach before God’s church and a watching world?
7. Do you now willingly take leadership in this church, in response to God’s call on your life and your own desire; do you promise to faithfully discharge the duties of a pastor in this community to the best of your ability, and even beyond, by the grace of God in your life?

Elder Installation (asked of the congregation)

1. Do you, the members of Sojourn, profess your readiness to receive these men, as they answer the call to be your pastors?
2. Do you promise to receive the word of truth from these men with submission and love, following them as they follow Christ, and receive their encouragement and admonishment as they shepherd you in your Christian faith?
3. Do you promise to encourage these men and joyfully take part in all their work as they lead this church?
4. Do you promise to support them, with acts of service and generosity, with your time and talents and with your finances as Scripture calls you to do so; to supply them in their needs for the sake of their work for the gospel on your behalf, on the behalf of your city and on behalf of the nations?

Congregational Care by Elders

The elders are essential to congregational care and oversight. This should be obvious, because elders, by definition, ought to be caring for the sheep and exercising oversight. Our elders do this in a few different way.

First, we pray for people. We pray when called up. We seek to pray for people when they need help. And we pray for our people at our elders meetings and retreats.

Second, our elders oversee our growth groups. Ben is the point man, but most of our elders–a couple elders are excused because they are involved in our executive committee–are responsible for overseeing a few growth groups each. This does not mean they lead a group in their home, though they can if they want.  Oversight means two things. One, it means that the elders come to the every other month growth group leaders training session and meet with the leaders under their care. This is a time to trouble shoot, hear how things are going, and pray. Two, oversight means that the members of the leaders growth group (see previous point) are in the elder’s district (see below).

Third, we divide the church into elder districts. The district is first of all assigned by growth groups. So if Larry oversees two leaders, Moe and Curly, then Larry has all the members of Moe and Curly’s growth groups in his district (man is that a rough district). The elder district also includes members not in a growth group and regular adherents of the church who, for whatever reason, have not joined. These names, non-growth group members and adherents, are assigned alphabetically. The elder is responsible to pray regularly for his district, and he must make contact with each person in the district at least once a year.

We do not expect the elders to personally disciple the people in their districts or know everything going on in their lives. This is why we have growth groups. But the elder usually has a good feel for the major issues that have surfaced. Our elders meet twice a month. The second meeting of the month is our normal business meeting. At this meeting we always ask “who is in need of spiritual help and/or is not making faithful use of the means of grace?” Follow up calls are usually assigned based on the district someone is in.  Three times a year we do a thorough review of our districts as an entire elder board.